We all go through cycles, ups and downs in life. And sometimes you need to lean on friends, family, or a friendly stranger. Maybe it was a bad day at work, or hearing that a good friend is sick, or today… a long, low-grade and building frustration that just exhausts your reserves of energy, hope, resilience.
May 11, day 56 of my NYC shelter-in-place and I’ve enjoyed some of the this time and reconnecting with friends, but this was a down day (few days) – that coronacoaster is real. My journal entry reads “A day to dismiss – unproductive, feeling ill, sad for my young friends experiencing such disruption and separation from their school friends, depressed/angry at Ahmaud A’s murder and the conversations friends need to have with their black sons in the USA. Several moments of crying and fatigue, feeling the pain of the world today, grateful to stay home and hidden.” Imagining one friend with his 5 and 8 year olds, in their Elmo pyjamas, learning an age-appropriate version of the news; or other friends’ talking with their straight-A, sweet and elegant 14 year old. Five lines, no gratitude list, nor reflections, plans, intentions.
I wasn’t sure if I would even participate in the 7pm daily cheering for essential workers… one of the few moments of connection and one which I love! But, so tired. Then the clapping and pot-clanging starts, I pushed myself onto my fire escape, look around, too tired to yell along, but then see this…
Things are still messy in the world, but his enthusiasm is contagious, my mood shifts, and I’m better equipped to deal with the world.
June 16 post-script. A lot has happened in the interim (discussed a bit in other posts), and yesterday was day 91 of shelter-in-place, day 15 of renewed BLM marches and protests for justice, it’s Pride month and the US Supreme Court decided today to protect LGBTQ folk from workplace discrimination. While there are many calls for unity, equity, inclusion, we all still feel isolated, and are at different points on the “coronacoaster.” In the vein of silver linings and a bit of humor, this happened yesterday, June 15. Imagine the scene of two New Yorkers yelling across a block of space. Thank you neighbors for keeping me & each other strong. I am so grateful.
